Life is Punny and Forever

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A few weeks ago my wife’s cat died. We buried her beside the house. My wife was very sad. I told her, “Don’t worry about Tabby. She is okay. I’m sure that she is in Purr… gatory.”Cat 40131-image_59c2b15479ac5.jpg

I am a proud proponent of the mighty pun. Puns brighten the lives of others. I believe that a good pun is its own re-word.

Furthermore, punsters are seen wise, witty, and whimsical. A force to be reckoned with.

Historically, powerful puns have compressed layers of meaning into fewer words.

At the signing of the Declaration of Independence, Benjamin Franklin said, “We must all hang together or assuredly we shall all hang separately.”

1) Kid Puns – Have you ever seen a horse fly?

Children like puns because it’s like playing a trick on someone. They expect one thing and something else appears. Often kids will give a straight answer to the setup question. So they are even more surprised by the funny switch.

What 2 things can you never eat for lunch? Breakfast and dinner.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.

What do you give to a sick bird? Tweetment.

What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tuna piano but you can’t tuna fish.

What disappears as soon as you say its name? Silence.

2) Puns for Big Kids

How do you feel when there is no coffee? Depressocoffee

What do you call an empty can of Cheez Whiz? Cheese Was.

Present, Past and Future walk into a bar. It was tense.

3) Punny Observations

My get up and go got up and went.

I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

Sure I drink brake fluid. But I can stop anytime.

My dog can do magic tricks. She’s a Labra”kadabra”dor.

4) Special Puns for “Certifiable Pun-atics”

What does the dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do? He lays awake at night wondering if dog godthere is really a dog.

Gandhi walked across the desert with little food and no oral hygiene products. At the end of his journey, he was a: super callused fragile mystic vexed with halitosis.

A Challenge – Just for the Pun of It

I challenge you to make the world a happier place.

I ask you to take 2 steps:

1) Pretend that life is funny and forever.

2) Keep a little notebook with you, to jot down new puns to share with others.

As an author, my final words are:

“When I am dead, I hope it may be said:

‘His sins were scarlet, but his books were read.’ ”

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Coming Presentations:

September 14, 2019. “Lincoln’s Most Powerful Personality Trait.” Pen to Podium Toastmasters,Tucson, AZ.

September 20, 2019. “How Abraham Lincoln Used Stories to Touch Hearts, Minds and Funny Bones.” Tucson Civil War Study Group. Tucson, AZ, 10:00 am.

February 12, 2020. “How Abraham Lincoln Used Stories to Touch Hearts, Minds and Funny Bones.” Sun City Anthem @ Merrill Ranch in Florence, AZ, 2:00 pm.

Related Links

Like Abe Lincoln, Be Prepared with a “Quip” or a Bit of Humor

Emulate Abraham Lincoln: Make Each Day Count

The “Secret” Daily Affirmations of Abraham Lincoln

Always greet everyone, no matter what they look like

Employ an Affable Lincolnesque Persona

Be a Generous Listener, as Abe Lincoln Was

Deflect Criticism with Self-deprecating Humor

Always Say “Yes”

Be a Master of Disaster – Ponder the big picture

Nourish humor and tell stories, so people say — “I felt like I had known him/her my whole life and we had long been friends.”

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